Looking Out, What Looks Back

Window Vanity
Cherry Wood, Mirrors, Brass Hardware

For this object I rebounded from the homemade temporal objects of sugar and wanted to make something using my craft and skills but still something that was me. Someone told me my tea sets were very me, which made me consider how I am perceived by the people around me. For most of my life at RISD I have felt like my true self was not good enough to be here, to work alongside the craftspeople or to pin my pieces next to the fine artists. I felt like I needed to change myself, the way I dress, the way I spoke, so that I could be respected and appreciated. So for this project I wanted to make something for myself, about myself, with myself.

The concept for this project came from something that happened one day. I had to go up to the bank just to get some quarters but being me, I wanted to look good as I did it. I spent time picking my outfit, matching by belt to my shoes, grabbing the nicest pair of stockings with the least amount of runs and perfectly pinning my hat onto my head. And when I looked in the mirror I liked what I saw and I felt like me. But as I was walking back from the bank a man passed me. He made eye contact with me then looked me up and down. And the first thought that I went through my head was “fuck you don’t look at me”. I immediately felt no longer like myself but like an object in someone else’s world, put on display.

For this object I wanted to think about my reflection when alone and how I am perceived in the world, and delve into the liminal space between these two feelings. The contradictions of wanting to be seen but not looked at wanting to be noticed but not perceived. The vanity sits at the window, framing the user in a small mirror with the outside world behind it. But it also shows the user with the mirrors on the side. Light coming through the tarnished areas, obscuring and clarifying the reflection.